Bummer Pistachios

I munched down on bunch of pistachios tonight. The impossible to have just a few type.

There is hardly an occasion of pistachio consumption that occurs without remembering a story from close friend Gene McHugh.   (https://bruceczopek.wordpress.com/2012/03/13/move-over-david-hockney/)

You know what happens when you eat pistachios.  They’ve been roasted to perfection, the shells popped open to such a helpful angle, making the liberation of this delicacy an oh so easy process.  This keeps you coming back for more, nothing breaking your stride,  your taste buds in nuciferous nirvana.  Suddenly comes the nut that has refused to pop open.  It is sealed shut, tightly indifferent to your precious taste buds and whatever foodular momentum you’ve got going on.  You stop…. you look at it to make sure there is no point of entry…..you briefly consider if your teeth can handle blunt force tactics….. and finally, giving up all hope, you express your disappointment with an audible or internally inaudible, owhhhhh.

In the world of Gene McHugh these are called “Bummer Pistachios”.

He coined the phrase many years ago when wilder times were the norm. Exercising his artistic sense of humor, he would wait until his friends who had stopped over to visit and partake in herbal camaraderie  were sufficiently “relaxed”.  The he would pop into the kitchen and bring back a bowl of delicious looking pistachios.  Except these were 100% renegade pistachios who had not given into the roasting process and were tighter than Scrooge’s ass before the ghosts showed up.

With a grand flourish the bowl would be placed amidst the friends.  This was an exciting moment as we can all relate to (those of us that have inhaled).  But as soon as someone would realize they had picked up an antisocial pistachio, he or she would inevitably say. “bummer, man”.  It was always amazing to Gene how many pistachios they would pick up, look at, and repeat their mantra of disappointment  before giving up on the bowl altogether.

The quintessential bummer pistachio.

Cover photo for the platinum selling album “Bite Me Baby” by the B.P. Quintet
A huge success in the Middle East.

It is a well known fact that Bummer Pistachios cannot mate. Everyone knows this except the pistachios.

And from that time forward such recalcitrant nuts have been known as Bummer Pistachios.  I am considering entering this into Wikipedia.  We’ll see.

Thanks for taking some LIP from me,

Bruce

P.S.  Live a little- click on the photos to enlarge them.

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