Take a deep breath. Feel it go in through your nostrils, feel your belly and your lungs fill and expand and arrive to full in your frontal line. Now feel the release of pressure as air comes back out the pathways it entered. Rest in the space between breaths and…. ahh… uhmaa.. ahem–this probably isn’t a good time to tell you this, but -that next breath? There is no guarantee that it will occur. Please read the fine print in your contract of Light made dense by Spontaneous Manifestation.
It goes something like: “Just because you had a lot of good breaths, please do not assume that implicitly guarantees a continuation of said services. We reserve the right to spontaneously change the pattern of manifestation as well as spontaneously manifest manifestation because that is what spontaneity is all about. Thank you for your understanding.”
You might want to get a tad angry at such a statement. For me, however, anger is usually where I was at just prior to being handed the above contract. I more than likely was in the middle of a subjective tantrum, having completely identified with a situation of frustrated disbelief that something wasn’t working out as I wanted or would normally expect. And to be honest, I could distill that a teeney bit further and come up with, “What I felt I was owed.” Ouch. Or if you really want to get down to brass tacks- I was completely in the process of actively assuming a separate personality, thereby efficiently arresting any further attention from realizing, as my Spiritual Master, Adi Da would say when instructing children in the art of sensitvity, “You are more than what you look like”. Somehow, I get a feeling I am not alone in this particular club.
Oh, the myth of the “Guarantee”. But having the fine print pointed out before the actual exercising of the above described option is a big gift. And whoever enters my thick skull or hard heart at such moments to deliver it, let me express my gratitude.
There is a reaction that now takes place for me in this event of being made aware of contractual specificities. Everything heavy suddenly drops away. The heaviest being the emotion of expectation for one outcome or another. And there is simply free attention and a relaxed heart. A certain disposition of being, of feeling with awareness. A pleasurable, sit down at the rivers edge with your feet dangling in the warm water of flowing change kinda feeling. Suddenly whatever happens next is pretty damn okay because it just doesn’t have to.
And it also dawns that there is no reason to be expecting a certain behavioral response from those I am with under whatever circumstance. That doesn’t mean things get stilted. Au contraire. Free attention is a feeling matter and that is a feeling of being present in this moment. And this moment. And this moment……. Another one of those fine print thingies that is worth finding out about.
Thanks for taking some LIP from me,