Consciousness’s Job Review

Reviewer: Thank you for being here  today for this job review.

Consciousness: Your welcome.  Actually I’m always here. Nothing personal, but  normally you’re just a little too   preoccupied to notice. I just amped things up a bit to help out today. Kinda burn some of the fog off, you know.

Reviewer:  Uh….okay…. uh, thanks again. Shall we proceed?

Consciousness: No problem

Reviewer: First let’s go over some practical things to make the record keepers happy. I noticed you didn’t put down a residential address.

Consciousness: That is correct.

Reviewer: Could you give that to me now and I’ll just fill it in.

Consciousness: I’m  nowhere.

Reviewer: Nowhere? Do you mean you’re homeless? Could you be more specific?

Consciousness: Actually I am everywhere.

Reviewer: Please,  we just need to have the records updated. So which is it. Nowhere or everywhere?

Consciousness:  Both.

Reviewer: Come again?

Consciousness: I am everywhere. There is no place I am not. So you don’t have to go anywhere to get to me- consequently, since I am no place you can go, I am nowhere.  Everywhere and nowhere. Nowhere and everywhere. Get it?

Reviewer: Not really

Consciousness:  Don’t worry. It’ll hit you some day.   Let the bureaucrats work out the street address okay?

Reviewer: Fine. Moving on – I see you didn’t fill in your birthdate. We need that for social security.

Consciousness: Are you serious? Okay, I see you are. Let me put it this way:  I was never born.

Reviewer: Uh, please….. how old are you?

Consciousness: You’re not supposed to ask that are you?  Let just say I can never die.

Reviewer: You’re making this complicated.

Consciousness: Look, you’ve got infinity on one side and infinity on the other.  Right? Can you show me the middle?  Didn’t think so. Don’t we have other things to talk about?

Reviewer:  Fine. Let’s talk about your work habits….. Generally we feel you do a good job at jumping into things and getting started. But we have noticed that you could benefit from a little more organization.

Consciousness: I must confess, I don’t have a much of plan past a certain point.

Reviewer: And what is that point?

Consciousness: Manifestation

Reviewer:  Pardon me?

Consciousness: I mean I really want to be here, hanging as everyone and everything. You could say it is a completely spontaneous kinda thing. So here we are but once things get conditional, I am not really sure where it’s all going. Actually  I don’t see the point, anyway. It’s all kinda the same in my book. I’m not really that goal oriented.

Reviewer: You must have a plan to get anything done in a timely fashion.

Consciousness: Things do progress a bit slowly, I must say. But hey, at least it seems like once things get dense there is a mechanical part that just takes over, kinda keeps things in  balance. Until it’s not. But then balance tries to reasserts itself in one form or another.  Things have gotten a little better don’t you think? Just because there is a little bit of mechanical order, though,  doesn’t mean I can take credit for some plan or something. I mean really- do you plan your dreams out?

Reviewer: Uh, this is your job review. I don’t want it to make it about me, so–

Consciousness:  Uh huh…..  Remember that mechanical thingie?  Sorry , you make everything about you. Kinda hard not to but….. Look, this sense of separateness is just a neat little organizing tool that gets a big head  once things get rolling and forgets where it came from. If you have some sort of form, it is handy to know not to walk out in front of a bus, right?  The stove is hot right? Okay, so don’t touch it! That’s what “you” is good for.  But really, feel into it. You really think you are an individual? A some one in a bunch of someones?

Reviewer: Of course

Consciousness:  I know, everybody does. It is this funny little hitch in the flow of things. Spontaneous manifestation has its drawbacks.

Reviewer: What does this have to do with your job?

Consciousness: Actually,  I don’t have a job. Never did. Don’t want one. Nope.

Reviewer: What do you do?

Consciousness: Be

Reviewer:  What about all of stuff you’re saying just showed up?

Consciousness: Just because “you” see boundaries, things that look separate with lines and distances and blah blah- you think there is a lot of  different things going on.  Well,  you say  “to-may-to”, I say  “to-mah-to”.  There might be discreet forms, but that doesn’t mean they are separate now, does it?

Reviewer: I don’t know.

Consciousness:   As far as I’m concerned there are way too many seemingly separate things for there to really be any  separate things. No way I could pull that off.  Really- it’s all just condensed water vapor  sloshing around in a big sea. A little choppy on the surface maybe so it feels like a bunch of action going on and you get excited by it all and put a lot of energy into counting all the waves. But eventually you get real tired of making differences, of  counting waves, of treading water just to count waves. And when you finally sink below the surface you’ll see it’s  one big sea. Nothing separate going on. Only sea.  Sea only. You forgot about the waves. Boy, let me tell you, that’s a relief. Not a lot going on then  really. But everything goes on.  There’s more I can say but your eyes are looking a bit glazed over.

Reviewer: I think I need more time to digest this and come up with a recommendation for management.

Consciousness: Oh, you’ll have lotsa chances to figure it all out.   Take my word for it. Hey!  Hows about lunch?  I’m hungry. You must be too, since I am you and you are me.

Reviewer:  What…..what?

Consciousness:   Sorry, couldn’t resist that one. ….. we’ll talk about that later…… maybe over  dessert..

Thanks for taking some LIP from me,



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